-Pass, pass, sorry mess. Feel free. Is that at this time to walk every mile a minute. Something to drink? "Hot Cocoa? A Tabaquite?
"No thanks, I'm allergic to chocolate, and I'm leaving the cigarette. Black coffee will be fine.
"I prefer something stronger-Santa Claus press a button intercom and orders. A black coffee for me, as usual.
minutes later an elf enters carrying a tray with coffee and a bottle of whiskey. Turns around and leaves. I notice that there is something wrong in their eyes.
- What happened to that elf? His eyes are very red ...
"It must be the early-morning maracachafa. So get at times. After a while they laugh all alone.
- Are you serious? Do the elves do to that?
"Sure, here they all do. Or do you think that this plant stands alone? If not for the elves who work here have some kind of addiction, I could not keep them hanging on to the ball. They have to work like dogs 357 days a year, with a paid shit, and have only Nochedelabuena free until 2 January. Without doping, could not endure.
- But that's terrible!
"No, man. As I see it, have more days off than the average office worker.
"But I say by doping. Surely he will fight ...
"Well, I tell him no. We are all a happy family, as Barney says that the lizard. Each elf gets her share and no greed at the other, because if you want little bit extra, I charge to pay for the following week. Even the reindeer use it. Where do you think that is Rudolph's nose? It is not cold, or because he had gotten a puñetiza. Coca cola is not, why not blow as you can imagine.
- Is there a rehabilitation center?
- "To lose such good employees? No way! Children would be very sad.
- You will makes that thing?
"From time to time. It has to example, and the stress of work required to take a longer break than that provided by the Kit Kat . But I'm going more natural. A porro liadita when toy and resellers get heavy, no one hurt. But me.
Let's talk about another matter. What about the fact that people believe that you do not exist?
- You know what? Humans really are unrecognizable. They say they do not exist and yet I have every window in each representation of Christmas, each jojojo, wrapping paper, ornaments, wreaths, advertisements and films of the season. Only humans worship as something they have never seen in the flesh. There has to religions, for example.
"But these are based on faith.
- And the children have no faith in me, to receive a gift? What, that does not count because they are kids?
"No, I did not say that, but ...
"Leave, leave. Assessment is a fairly common error people. Next question.
-Estee ... You see as a threat to the fact that people recover promote the spirituality of Christmas?
- For nothing! You see, every year displayed these pseudo-advocates of spirituality and leave the same message: "Christmas is not just presents and turkey, is to love, share and remember its true meaning." This is pure hypocrisy, a sentence of more cardboard, because basically, all these people coming out on TV saying these things more expensive gifts delivery to your monthly salary and dinner better than anyone. And they die to receive gift. Ask them if they do not.
"But some people will not come out on TV and think alike. And to help those in need.
"That does not mean that no longer wish to gift. And there is another phrase cardboard: "Helping those who need it." Who is needed? Does not have anything or one who believes none? People say these things and do not stop to think about them. Some do good works, yes, but they are starting at the time, to feel good about themselves and believe they will go to heaven-to-cloud-of-cotton. Christmas ends and that's generosity. These are people who does not bring the spoon to the bottom of the pot.
- And the hits you?
"Hey, hey, here do not talk about those things ...
"I say, a spoon. Do you engage in the problem? I've heard people who think like you.
"Me and engage me enough, for what else. As for the other, yes, I heard these people. But critics are like film and TV, sit scratching their goatee thinking big words and pretending to use the Sword of Omen. Mencióneme one of those critics to leave his position and become more militant. No, right? But I love coming up as champions of modern thought, criticizing everything, say they must change, and to get ideas, but they are very ambiguous, clichés, generalities. They do not propose something specific, and therefore did not stop ball.
"But there are people who support them.
"But why, exactly. They offer no solutions, because they do not, and how people do not have them, and find it easier to say "Yes, indeed, leave it at that. I am too lazy to get to work on it. Give ball just because that fish follow a stream of progressive thought is more comfortable. And looking fit into the ideology of the politically correct society.
"You talk like a sociologist.
"Nor well, we're going to respect. I to you I have not bitched. It's just that I've read enough.
- Do you enjoy reading?
- jojojo course! You'd be surprised to see my personal library. I have from Socrates to special editions of Playboy.
-Eeh ... I think that we stray from the subject. How does it make to deliver the presents in one night? Because neither a blunt tip makes the reindeer fly, and with that belly, or the corner comes in and gets tired. No offense, of course.
"No offense. And look, he got a verse without effort. But it is not funny, it is obvious that everything is a myth and denied by the Discovery Channel . For that they are the distributors, airlines, couriers the Importing and doting parents. I save all the work. For me just to deceive their children telling them to behave. I produce, the Chinese produce, they delivered. And problem solved.
- Are the Chinese?
- Of course! I have another factory in China, larger than this! Labor there is cheaper, it is an advantage that has both poor peasant. And the illusion is maintained, because there is snow and cold makes a fucking saint. We are even considering to move there, because recently we found that in 40 years this center will go to recarajo . With this production cater Latin American markets, Asia and Oceania, while we take care of America and Europe. Africa will not stop ball, we do not report profits.
"Then it is true that the chimneys and cookies ...
"Let me tell you something: that is the fault of movies. I'm not so gilberto getting into chimneys and then go out as the son of coal. And what of the houses have no chimneys? In your country the houses have chimneys? And with the economic crisis they are safe, who in their right mind is as eyesores to leave milk and cookies there thrown away, or hang up stockings? It's all paraphernalia Yankee Christmas, never mind, son.
"I'm his son, fortunately. Is it true that you are just an invention of Coca-Cola?
"No, they just gave me the dress. I was there before they arrived. At Coca only do they advertise the colors, and go out with a contour bottle occasionally. It is a very profitable contract, actually. But sometimes it do to pray to pay, and if I ever get unhappy, there's always Pepsi.
"I think not. Can you be so interested?
"Everything is a matter of training, child.
-That I am his son, by the very large. How do you spend Christmas?
"I call my three Mamanuelas y. .. Does this child will not read it, right?
"No, I think. But let him, I guess. And people who say that you are not, but the Divine Child who leaves gifts, what do you think?
"They can say whatever they want, like, me and the turkey ball stop us more than him.
- Do not feel guilty to know that you are not anything that many people, and children, above all, imagine?
"The fault lies with the parents and the media as you represent. I am an advocate of the dreams of them all: for me it's OK to believe what they want to believe - Rolex Watch your -. Any other thingy?
"No, I think I've had enough for today. I am retiring, but not telling you is a creep, operator, promoter of joint consumption, malaleche, cynical, degenerate stoner and a polygamist hijodeunagransiete. And being killed by the train and have a Merry Christmas.
"Thank you, thank you but as the song says: I'm still the king. Did you like coffee with LSD? And will effect you. Merry Christmas, son. Jojojo.
